What’s In a Webpage Statement?

What does it mean to Advocate for Faith Hope and Love in Sex, Sexuality & Sensuality as our webpage states?

It is a question that I have wanted to answer for a time now, but now just getting around to it.  As the founder of RLM I have given it thought how the three; faith, hope and love, should support our decisions regarding sex, sexuality and sensuality.  But first let me discuss the later three just for a moment.

I believe that sex, sexuality and sensuality are all different yet very relatable to one another.  We do think that the three working together, in consort with one another, is much better than when one is singled out at the expense of the others.  We could have sex without sensuality, yet Im not sure that would be a very fun & healthy experience. It might look more like a prostitute kind of relationship.  You might not care much about their sensuality, or even there sexuality for that matter. The buyer simply wants to get off.  He is not interested in the catch or the life of the ‘other.’ But when the three are in unity with faith, hope & love we believe we have the best potential of lasting joy in the sexual experience.  This is our opinion.

But how would we know if sex, sexuality and sensuality were being expressed in right ways?  What a good question! Which brings us to finding a standard to measure these three against.  What we have found is when Biblical faith, hope and love become that standard which the other three are influenced by, then we get further to the intent of God for sex, sexuality and sensuality, and closer to glorifying God in them, which is our passion.  To be perfect in sex, sexuality and sensuality would be awesome to us. Yet we feel that we have not done so well. Though we understand we are not alone. Just because we know that we will never be able to hit a home run ever time we are up to bat does not mean we do not learn and practice to get closer to such a high goal!  Faith, Hope and Love become our teachers in such an education.

Let me try and begin by defining these words:

  • When we refer to sex, we are referring to sexual activity.
  • As human beings we have the capacity of sexual feeling and preferences.  This is what we are calling sexualtiy.
  • Sensuality can be defined as the enjoyment, expression, or pursuit of physical, especially sexual, pleasure

These are well enough definitions I think.  Sure we could dink around with them a bit here and there, but for my purposes, they work, and all of us believe there included in the Biblical narrative as seen in the lives of men & women.

The Bible was written over 1500 years by many authors, yet it is said in the New Testament book of Peter, that it actually was the Holy Spirit that moved upon the writers.  I find this kind of cool due to the inclusion of these three in it’s pages. Having these three included in the Bible reiterates what I already understand in life. That is these three are a part of the human condition of being.  As humans we have sex. As humans we have feelings and desires regarding sex. And as humans we can pursue the joy of sexual pleasure in our lives. Wouldn’t it be odd if you had a Holy book that did not include such normal observed behavior in the world?  Ours does!

When I was younger, I did not look at the three in light of such words as Faith, Hope and Love.  These three never actually related much to the other three. Where would I have learned about faith in sex?  What is faith in sex? What is faith? Or how does Biblical hope in Christ’s return to earth affect my sexual feelings and preferences?  I never thought that a BIblical definition of love could govern my pursuit of sexual pleasure. In short, I was completely secular. And this is what our statement is striving against at it’s basic level.

The inclusion of Faith, Hope & Love in Sex, Sexuality & Sensuality is our aim here.  And this leads us to search our sacred texts for answers regarding such things. Having a safe place to do so within the Church culture is what we are offering.  

We also recognize that within the Church environment there has been a plethora of strong opinions regarding sex, sexuality and sensuality.  Some of these views have lead to heinous acts in the name of God. We do not recognize these acts as being in faith, hope and love. Within our current culture we find having a place to discuss, study & pray about the topics of sex, sexuality and sensuality, in a familiar Bible study format can be very intellectually satisfying.  This is why we use the term advocating. It means to publicly support. And our hope is to support those that desire to pursue that standard which is ultimately God. Quite an endeavor for sure!

 

 

Sex, to the glory of God

What a title! I hope I have your attention now. We live in a sad time where we don’t equate the two right? Sex, the glory of God…what do they have in common? I was speaking the other day at the university and before the service we sent out teams to get the students to come in and attend the talk I was giving on better pleasure. One of the leaders who went out encountered a girl and ask her if she would be interested in listening to a talk on porn and the bible. The girl looked at the leader with a blank stare and began trying to figure out in her overwhelmed brain now the two go together. That is kind of how it is with sex and the glory of God. Oh they go together…or they should.

Now I can tell you a quick way to start your marriage of in a jacked way; do not pay attention.

This is important.

If you and your future spouse do not see the pursuit of Christ in the most intimate of places…the bed room…then you will have some potential problematic issues for sure.

All things are to be done for the glory of God. Even sex.

What would it be like if you don’t see sex as a way to glorify God? It would become a secular experience alone. That’s porn and porn is duty…they get paid!

What makes sex a God glorifying experience? Wouldn’t it simply be what makes eating food sacred act as well…or anything else for that matter. When we live our lives with a heart of thanksgiving to The Lord and prayer we see from rabbi Paul that it is a God glorifying act. See Tim ch. 4

When sex becomes a God glorifying act it is done with the same attitude. Thankful hearts come to the marriage bed! Hearts that want to seek the joy of Christ in the act of sex. If this is foreign concept to you, I apologize..we pastors need to teach the entire bible which is all about a real, intimate relationship between God and His people. See Ezk 16, but really, the whole bible is about this oneness. See John 17 too!

See Christ exalting sex is all About what you bring into the bed, When a man or woman say watches pornography and then enters the bed they import those images to find arousal. That is lust, not love, no matter what body is in the bed with you. That cannot glorify God even if its with your wife. Why? Lust seeks its own, love does not. Love pursues the joy of the beloved while lust
knows not such things but is satisfied only in self. For God to be glorified he must be the focus, and God does not lust the world, he loves it Sex should reflect that, everything else is a lesser joy,a distortion.

Christ glorifying sex is the best, because God is the greatest pleasure! If pursuing Jesus in your heart when in the marriage bed then you a going after the better pleasure. Come drink from the river of Gods pleasure. Taste and see that he is good. At His right hand are pleasures forever more.

Why would we remove God from the marriage bed? Maybe it’s been the way your were brought up. Maybe affection was not showed or modeled to you as a child or teen. Giving yourself to someone is a big deal, there is no abuse like sexual abase, so lets exalt it! But if we don’t seek to glorify our Lord in it, then it is just porn, common is that way, a path most taken.

Sex can be scary for newly weds. Pray, be thankful for the gift you are to one another. Ask The Lord to give you a heart for His glory and you won’t go wrong. Love and not lust will rule. For we are one with Him in Spirit it says, so you are acting out a sermon on your marriage bed…Christ and the Church, becoming one…a prophetic dance it is! What joy for those called to marriage. Enjoy!